Millennial Money Honey

Hey guys! Today, I have a guest post I wrote for The Money Minimalists blog. My friend, Kseniya, is a licensed real estate agent in Florida and a personal finance blogger and gives advice on achieving financial independence through real estate investing. For more content by her, check out the article she wrote on the first steps to first time home buying.

Dating is challenging as is, and given our circumstances it’s extra difficult, but it’s also been fun to get creative with it. At first I was resigned to not dating until the whole coronavirus situation was over, but now that it seems shelter in place is here to stay for the foreseeable future, I’m ready to get back out and try dating again under these new “normal'“ circumstances.

However since we can’t just meet up for drinks, I’ve brainstormed 6 free or frugal ideas for your next date night, all doable whether you’re physically with a partner or not!

1. PICNIC IN THE PARK

Together: Pack a picnic and a blanket and hop on your bike to your local park. It’s a nice change of pace to get out of the house for some fresh air. You can people watch over a beautiful charcuterie plate!

Apart: BYOMeal and blankets and sit 6 feet apart while eating your food. You can still watch people and talk together. Just because we’re physically distant doesn’t mean we have to be socially distant!

2. SOCIALLY DISTANT WALK & TALK

Is it just me or is everyone and their mom going walks these days? Or maybe you’re like me and going on walks with your mom.

Together or apart: Hiking trails, by nature, are very narrow. It’s much easier to stay the recommended 6 feet apart from either your partner or people around you when you’re on a well paved sidewalk or street.

Grab your face mask and head to a fancy neighborhood to walk & talk, look at nice houses, and fantasize about which one you’d own! Talking about home ownership is a casual way to bring up my ultimate fave topic, life goals. This way I can ask questions about how they’re using their money to attain said goals! SUBTLE. (Or maybe not so much?) I have no chill.

If the relationship progresses, one day you might be using Kseniya’s free Home Buying Guide to start looking for your actual home together! ;)

3. QUARANTINE COOK-OFF

Sheltering in place seems to have turned everyone into quite the chef! I myself haven’t baked in years and all of a sudden I’ve turned into a Martha Stewart wannabe.

Together: Create the most extravagant meal based on what you have at home. Get creative here! Put those Goldfish crackers and Kraft mac & cheese together and create the ultimate mac & cheese Goldfish crusted popper. Ramen egg frittatas? Canned bean and corn taco salad? It’s all fair game!

Apart: Assemble a recipe roulette and have each person contribute 3 recipe ideas. Have one person randomly assign them numbers and the other person select one. Both make the same dish, video chatting as you put it together. Bonus points to whoever can plate it better!

For the final finish, leave your sweatpants behind and get fancy for the night! Pour some champagne and light the candles. Whether in person or virtually you can still share a meal together.

4. TAKE PERSONALITY TESTS TOGETHER

To say I love personality tests is a gross understatement. But whether you “believe” in personality tests or not, I think paves the way for bigger discussion points like the way you think about the world and self-reflection!

Together or apart: Find your Myers Briggs type, Enneagram, Harry Potter house, Love Language, and Big Five score. If you’re into astrology try the Co–Star app, then discuss! Together or apart, this is a fun way to get to somebody more intimately.

5. MOVIE & GAME NIGHT

What would we do without technology keeping us socially connected?! Thank goodness for interwebz, or else you wouldn’t even be reading this right now haha.

Apart: Watch and discuss Tiger King together via Netflix Party. Share your screen via Zoom and play virtual interactive Jackbox Games, play Animal Crossing if you have a Switch, or House Party for some fun rounds of Heads Up.

Together: Do a puzzle. If you have two, do a puzzle challenge and see who can finish faster. If you’re together, still watch Tiger King...because you need to understand what all the cool cats and kittens are wilding out about. Or brush off those old cards and play some classic gin rummy or nertz.

6. WINE & PAINT AT THE MUSEUM

One of my favorite in-person dates to go on in Los Angeles is the museums. Unfortunately most are closed right now, but that doesn’t have to stop you becoming an art aficionado.

Together or apart: Experience art and culture without ever leaving the comfort of your couch by going on a virtual museum tour. Visit The Broad in Los Angeles, The MoMA in NYC. Waltz through the Musée d’Orsay in Paris and many more museums via Google Arts & Culture! All of these amazing art institutions are offering FREE digital tours of their world class art collections.

After you’ve both found your favorite piece on display, grab a glass of wine and create some art yourself by drawing your partner. I’ve been attempting blind contour drawings–classic art class exercise. They often end up so bad that they’re kind of great. It’s hilarious and honestly makes for a pretty good abstract masterpiece. Maybe you will become the next Picasso!

Hopefully this list gives you a few frugal ideas to jump start your next quarantine date night. Leave a comment below with some fun date ideas you’ve tried! We’ll get through this COVID-19 together and back to real life soon.

Disclosure: Some of these links are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I may earn some compensation. All opinions are 100% my own! I truly appreciate you and your support. :)

Back in 2017, I decided that one of my resolutions would be to do a shopping ban.

I was a pretty spend-y gal prior to starting this. I’m not kidding when I say shopping was my cardio. I’d easily spend 7+ hours at the mall going through every store. I never went into debt for anything, but it is SO easy to spend a few hundred at Aritzia or Zara or Revolve.

My hope was that a shopping ban would significantly decrease my personal expenses, force me to live mindfully with what I already had, and help me be more environmentally conscious.

My Shopping Ban Challenge rules

I could buy products that needed replenishing. e.g. finish face wash; buy a new bottle
I could pay for experiences, e.g. going out with friends, traveling, food, etc.
I could buy clothes if it was an absolute necessity, e.g. buying a bridesmaid dress
I could buy gifts for others
It would last 3 months and then I could go wild 😜

Starting the shopping ban

I decided that the challenge would start on January 1st—classic new years resolution. As a last hurrah, I bought things I wanted as “Christmas presents” for myself before embarking on this shopping diet. I’m not even sure what I needed so badly. The “high” of a new purchase wears off very fast and clearly those purchases don’t spark any joy 3 years later.

Accountability & determination

January rolled around and I told all of my friends about my grandiose plan. This helped me remain accountable. Most friends were very encouraging, but a few close friends were doubtful that I could cut shopping cold turkey.

My friends were right in that I’m a pretty extreme person. It wasn’t an option in my mind to reduce spending by a little bit, it was 100% or nothing. Their doubt helped fuel my determination.

Unsubscribing from emails

As @saverspender posted the other day, for every $1 spent on email marketing, a brand typically sees about a $42 return.

I worked as an email designer for a long, long time so I subscribed to many email marketing lists for “research.” To reduce my temptation, I unsubscribed knowing that if I really missed the hundreds of emails spam I’d receive, I could opt-in again.

I used unroll.me to opt out of everything and honestly haven’t looked back. Even though it was so exciting to see something on sale for 50% off, that’s still money I wasn’t planning on spending.

Going through withdrawals

At first, I spent a lot of time thinking about the fact that I was doing a no-spend challenge. I’d walk into Target and literally just touch clothes to feel something. It was definitely not productive and even worse, it was very, very tempting. I started avoiding the clothes section entirely.

I’d put in my Amazon cart, face masks, a new eye cream I read about, a bug catcher and then click save for later. Withdrawals are normal, so I’d remind myself that this was only temporary. If I really wanted it all I could go hog wild later! “Three months. Three months. Three months,” I told myself.

The joy of less and giving

During the next few months I made the conscious effort to go through my products and finish every last drop. I’d giveaway things I didn’t need and I’d spend time researching the exact item I was going to replace it with.

Another major joy I found in these months was being able to buy things for friends birthdays or just because. It made me excited to mull over what would bring others happiness. The joy of giving increased my own happiness two-fold.

Q1 and beyond

April finally came around and I realized I really didn’t need or want the things I had pined over. From April to July I bought exactly one thing and ended up returning it because it didn’t fit well.

My newfound ability to consciously not buy had become a habit and I loved all the benefits (sustainability, savings, and self-awareness) so much that I ended up doing it in Q3 so I could save up for Christmas in Q4.

In 2018, I went full #nospendyear, which after having done it for 3 months on and off, made it not so much of challenge and more second nature. The next year, I only allowed myself to buy clothes thrifted and secondhand in 2019.

Key contributors to my success

Set a short duration for the initial shopping ban, increase slowly.
Avoided the challenge during an upcoming period of spending (moving, job changes, Christmas, etc.)
Unsubscribed to all marketing emails
Borrowed clothes to expand wardrobe—I have 3 sisters and 3 roommates who I could borrow clothes from if I needed

Did the shopping ban change my long term habits?

💯. The discipline and habits I’ve acquired during the shopping bans have carried on. I have little to no shopping urges and rarely browse for clothing online. That feeling of “I have everything I need” has stayed with me over the years.

I’m still a very extreme person. From not tracking my spending at all, I’ve become hyper-conscious of my spending. I realize I need to relax up on that a bit since I’m almost a bit miserly now. I’d like to give more generously.

I wish mental strength and resilience to all of you who are considering giving the shopping ban challenge a go. Even if you don’t succeed to seeing it through for the entire duration you set out on, you will not regret trying. If you have have any questions or need any encouragement write me a note in the comment section!

Disclosure: Some of these links are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I may earn some compensation. All opinions are 100% my own! I truly appreciate you and your support. :)